Thank You Family and Friends

     What a powerful and an overwhelming feeling to be baptised again.  I say that I was raised in the Church but really I was almost 10 before I went to church routinely.  I was baptised when I was 11 by Carver Bryan.  I lived with Mr. and Mrs. from the time I was almost 10 until I was 12 and 1/2.  During those years I received a good family home and good people to live with.  They had three children;  2 boys older and 1 girl a year younger than me.  Such a loving place, and it was those years that I let my mind and body relax.  No more fear about going home and wondering what I would find.  Enough!!  

     When I was first baptised I knew I was going to become a member of the Church and I should always obey the commandments, but other than that it doesn't seem I thought it was as big a deal then as I now do.  Having almost my whole family there to celebrate with me, and to witness the baptism and conferring of the Holy Ghost is the greatest thing that has ever happened. 

      One humorous thing happened during the baptism.  My oldest son, Doug, who was baptising me said the prayer that priesthood holders do for this and then was trying to lower me under the water but my arms were still above the water, so he took his other hand and pushed me down completely underwater.  When I came up and opened my eyes everyone was kind of chuckling.  He had been teasing me beforehand that he wasn't going to get me completely underwater so he would have to "dunk" me again.
       Receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost is one of the many blessings that I have.  Thanks to the priesthood and my son-in-law Mike, I just can't say enough about Doug and Mike.  They both were so wonderful, and the whole ceremony was so special.  Another great memory to make me smile!

                                                                                   

                                                                                            



Miracles

     Well, it seems that I am so special that I get a bad case of pneumonia and I am not even aware that I am sick except unable to be aroused and my lungs filling up in a matter of hours.  Way too weird..

It seems that I have someone watching over me.  I'm feeling so totally calm and good inside.  I am getting baptized tomorrow at noon.  I'm so excited.  I've been looking forward to this for a long time.  You know how you sometimes just put something off for awhile and then all of a sudden it's years later.  I'm not sure what it was that made me want to read the scriptures, but once I started I was hooked.  I read everything in the Ensigns.  I had a whole different perspective of my church and the things that I read made so much sense.  I grew up in the church and all my friends belonged, but I guess I needed more maturity because the Book of Mormon isn't just words but now reading is a story about ancestors and their struggles.

My family will all be there.  My oldest son will baptize me and my son-in-law will confirm me.  It really is extra special for me.  That really makes me smile.

Many Blessings

     Today I had a very good day.  My son Josh came over to visit.  He is such a sweetheart.  Everyone seems to have their own troubles at times, but when it's any of my children, well I wish that I could take it upon myself.  I hate to see any one of them hurting.  I also had two sisters from Church come by for a minute.

     Last Thursday I had both breasts removed.  I had a recurrence of breast cancer.  Each day has been just a little bit better.  Yesterday I had the tubes taken out and that was so great not having them hanging around, ha ha ha.I am really so blessed.  Many people reached out to help with food, encouragement and blessings.  

     My daughter Kellie is down from up north and I can't wait to see her.  She brought my granddaughter Lauren, my three great-grandchildren, Triton, Bronze and Milana.  I'm going to put Kellie to work helping me plant tulip bulbs for next spring.  Well,  it's getting to be close to my bedtime.  

Thankful

     I am today thankful in a way that I haven't been before.  As I take the time to look outside of myself their are many that are in real need.  I have so much.  A wonderful family and the love I feel for all of them overwhelms me at times.  Home is more than just a house no matter how fancy.  Home has a feeling about it that is comforting.  I have a husband that is so good to me that I keep wondering how to return the thoughtfulness.  My children are the best in the whole world.  Each one of them has a special way about them that is so special.  They all have a heart big as "Montana".  Then there is the grandchildren....God gave to me such a gift.  I am trying to be worthy of them.

     I recently heard about a friend who is in need of prayer.  This lady has always been so open and caring to me.  Just one of the sweetest people that I have ever known.  My prayers are with her and her family.  I pray they will be comforted knowing God loves them.

I Can't Wait...

     You would think by now in my life I would have developed patience.  One time in my life, quite a long time ago I prayed for patience.  I can't remember exactly why or what was happening at the time.  I sincerely wanted to be a better example for my children, who were very young.  I prayed and prayed and then came the opportunity to gain what I had asked for.  Let me just say that I learned, not easily or pleasantly, what having patience really means.  A hard lesson learned.  I'm still impatient about wanting something now and having a difficult time waiting.  I have never prayed for patience again, and I have warned others to be careful in what they wish for.

     Now comes the original thought.  I fight with my computer more times than get along.  Instead of going to the help section and starting at the beginning, I usually peruse through what is written and skip the dull parts....so now to the point...I have started at the beginning of a subject to learn about and quickly hurry through and get the same answers.  NOTHING...ha ha ha, it makes me chuckle at myself.  I have long since given up becoming mad at myself.  My kind husband says I should take a computer course.  I would love to if they taught exactly what I needed and not everything from soup to nuts.  I said to him the other day,  that I kind of like working on a computer problem.  I don't get anything done but it's fun.

Imagination...what a gift!!!

     I was talking with my son this morning while we listened to the rain hitting on the roof.  Somehow we got on the subject of imagination.  While we were listening, my mind drifted off to a faraway place....a place I have never been, but the images in my mind were as vivid as this picture.  I thought of ancient walkways and dim passages.  If I closed my eyes I could hear the clip clop of a single horse and rider somewhere nearby.  Old oil lanterns, unable to light the cobblestone pathway, eerily lead shadows to dance in the doorways of little shops and alleyways.  Slowly I open my eyes, and I am left with a faint smile and secret longing of the place that I had visited not but just a moment ago.


image credit: Google photos

Wonderful Life

     I'm on a pathway to becoming a member of the church that I grew up in.  I've been away for 20 years or so.  There are things that I must do, but I'm ready.  Many things in life change but as I go to church I find it hasn't changed.  I get the same comforting feeling as a child at home with her loving parents.  Secure, safe, and forever.
     I have found the scriptures to be more alive and much clearer.  I feel that though my lifetime I have gained some wisdom and insight into what I really believe.  My family means more to me than ever.  The genealogy my granddaughter has struggled with for a long time has become more real to me.  I am so thankful for my many blessings in life.
Thank You Lauren.....I love you!!


image credits: free nature photos

My Girls...Wow

I think almost everyone is proud of their kids and proud of the things that they can do.  I know, Pride is a "sin" but I think that it only applies to having "Pride" about self.  I can be proud of doing a good job at something, but to hold Pride of our selves is wrong. 

My oldest daughter, Kellie painted this....."Two Quakies".

When I look at this lovely scene it relaxes and soothes me.  I love mountains, streams and trees.  If I'm quiet I can here the water making it's way down the mountain.  I can hear the quaking of the leaves on the trees.  So wonderful...I smile!!







                My youngest daughter, Hannah painted this form of a woman. Both paintings are so different but they both give me cause of be proud of them.  Both girls have have let something from inside come out and be expressed in their own unique way.

This painting of a young woman is both sensual and innocent.  This may be a mirror of that part of every woman that causes men to go crazy over us.  "Thank goodness", is what I say.

Happy Reminder

     I'm thinking about this painting...how does it make me feel?  Watching the last of the fall leaves and bushes paint a happy reminder of the oh so busy summer.  Planting the yearly garden and watching it grow, rides on the mountain to look for deer and other critters, catching the last of the snow melt on the high reaches of the peaks.  Now with summer gone and winter making it's presents known I think of snowmen, candy canes, mittens and hats and Christmas carols.  I love this painting  for all that it reminds me of; but most of all it makes me smile.  The painter...Roring

Just Drop Me Off Here

Oh, wouldn't it be wonderful.  Warm, white sand.  A cute beach boy walking around.  I guess I shouldn't be dreaming about the beach boy.  You would think that I'm only 25 instead of my true age 35.  HA HA HA !! I've been to this place before and really only have to close my eyes and I can be right back there.  So many things I hold in my memories; so many pictures....mostly of family.  You know as I think about it, this place is a good place to visit but it's always good to be home.

Home is where my heart is...Au yes, being close to family.

Wonderful Fresh Feeling...

     What a good feeling to get rid of the clutter.  My youngest daughter and a friend are having a yard sale today and tomorrow.  I asked if I could contribute.  Yesterday I uncluttered my bookshelf in my bedroom.  I filled three boxes with books that I have read and liked very much.  It's a good feeling to provide great reading material.  My books are varied, from mysteries to books about Aliens; from scientific to religious.  I borrowed a book from my other daughter, it's a love story (second one in a collection of six), which I usually don't enjoy but I love this particular story.  It's not the gushy someone is having an affair type.  Lots of early Scottish history, the land and the people.
     Does anyone else keep things (clothes) too long?  I'm guilty.  I find something I like and wear it a few times and then I'm almost attached to it because I keep it but I don't wear it anymore.  Anyway,  I loaded up about 40 blouses and T-shirts and took them to Hannah's yard sale.  Between the books and shirts, I had quite a load.  Also my coffee maker, mixer and bowls, and a  pancake cooker.   I feel renewed.  Ha ha ha

Maturity

   I remember being 15 and knowing everything, or at least I thought so.  I had a boyfriend who I totally trusted and believed he knew everything about anything.  I felt perfectly safe with him knowing he would always take care of me.  My Mother and Father tried to tell me stuff about life in general.  "It's not like that anymore", I would say.  I didn't exactly know how old they were but they weren't "in the know".  They were my parents and wanted what was good for me.  In my mind they just wanted to tell me what to do and how to do it.

     Now in my adulthood, I've learned a few things in life.  My children are all over 21 and so you would call them adults.  I have a couple that really don't fall into the adult category mentally.  As their Mother, I love them more than life itself.  I wouldn't do anything to hurt them or steer them wrong.  I give them the best advice I possibly can, even if unsolicited.  If there is anyone in the whole world that they can trust, it is me.  Now is the question, why don't they listen to me?  Has their mentality stopped at 14 or 15?  Do they feel like I would tell them something that would harm them?  I'm just a parent living with the same questions as my parents had.  Why don't they listen to me, take my advice, trust me?

NEEDING!!

     I've realized again for the umpteen time that I need to let my imagination and memories fly... This blogging is just the ticket.  Watching tv or gardening doesn't do it.  Talking to others helps somewhat.  I've noticed when my three year old grand-daughter Jade is here, we both let our imaginations fly.  Sometimes we sit on my bed and we are fishing from a small boat.  All around us is the water.  We have rough waters occationally and I have to hold her in the boat or she can fall out.  This entails putting one arm around her and literally lifting her, with my arm around her, off the bed and across over me and back again, over and over.  This is so much fun for both of us (mostly for her).  I will surely pay for it.  Tomorrow I will be so stiff, but I do it anyway.  Sometimes when we go in the forest she will be the first to say "I think I hear a bear".  From then on we are shooting bears or finding small animals and taking them back to their home.  She seem to be able to talk animal talk.  Imagination...what a wonderful thing God invented.

Easter, and my-smiles

Today, for the first time in my adult (being a mother) life I didn't put out colored eggs for my children or grandchildren to look for. I wasn't feeling as good as I usually feel the last few days and I just didn't color eggs, buy candy, make up a couple of Easter baskets to give out. Today, was Easter and it took me until noon to finally remember the true meaning of this day. Our Lord, Jesus Christ has been resurrected. He truly lives, and somehow that makes me smile. A warm feeling surrounds me and I SMILE.

It's True!!!! Time flies by so dang fast.

         Sitting alone, getting ready to scream at my computer for not doing what I want it to do.  So I do just what I do everyday, sit and look out the window, and giving myself a time-out.  I only need a few minutes, like 4 or 5, and then " I feel like a new woman".  Just saying that last quote makes me smile very big.  My grandson Matthew has such great one liners..one day after taking a bath, he proudly proclaimed to his mother, "I feel like a new woman".  It was something that was memorable to her because the next time she called me she told me what he had said and we both laughed out loud together.  Now every time I think of it, well, you know, it's just one of those memories you won't forget!!  It's true!!! Time flies by so dang fast.

Vanity....what a curse!!

     I have been vain all my life, I think.  When I was a teenager, probably around 15, I used to put a "tint" on my hair.  It was so exciting when a few friends would get together and do each others hair.  Giggling, outright laughing, and we couldn't wait for the next day at school to show off.  The things I have tried to be beautiful.  I remember going to a birthday party for a boy that I thought was sooo cute.  I wanted to get my teeth shiny so I put clear fingernail polish on them.  All evening I kept my smile on, and kept checking in the mirror to make sure it wasn't flaking off.  What a idiot.  Even at my age I want to look good.  I can't do anything about the sagging and wrinkling but I try to keep my hair dyed especially the roots.  That's what I was doing today when I found out the City maintenance workers had shut off the water, to fix something.  Oh crap..now what was I going to do.  If I leave the dye on and try to wait for the water to come back on, my hair might fall out.  Well,  I sent my wonderful husband to the store to buy 3 gallons of water.  He had to heat  it up a little and then everything went perfectly.  I'm now a happy camper!!

Remembering

     Just thinking  about a journey I took on this day a few years ago.   I was living as a single mother on welfare.  One child (my first) still crawling and needing to be carried because he refused to walk even though he was 11 months old.  I was quite small, at being nine months pregnant.  I lived in a one bedroom apartment above a furniture store.  I had grown up in this town, graduated from high school here, and knew many of it's people, including the owners of the store below. 
     Like many pregnant women, I was very tired of being "with child".  This particular day I had to see my Dr.  Anyway, I was started into labor.  I had my aunt Viola (a nurse) with me to help me and I had my second baby soon after starting into labor. 
     There she was, so small, so beautiful, with light reddish curly hair and a warm, wonderful, body to hold and kiss.  I wasn't the only one smiling....I felt like the whole world was smiling with me. 
     This child though the years has given me so much happiness and joy.  Is it still a smile when there are tears in my eyes?  It's just LOVE.

Spring has sprung ??

     Yesterday was a warm spring day, I swear it was!  Today is beautiful but that old wind (Mariah) is blowing in a storm.  We could use the moisture for all the gardening I want to do.  I am so excited about warmer weather and green grass, birds chirping, trees with leaves rustling, and the little plants that I grow, peeking out of the ground to grow up toward the sky.  It's a miracle the way Gods hand touches the world and perfection is born.

Wondering

      Well I'm new to posting anything I want.  A great sense of freedom.  If I want,  I can say a bunch of stuff and then hide it which would be making a terrible blog.
      I have never thought of myself as creative, sometime things just seem to turn out.  Like my kids.  They all seemed to turn out to be the most beautiful kids in the world.  Not only on the outside but also on the inside.  They all have hearts of gold.  When I think about how great they all are, I really beam.  My kids are all scattered around. Some in different parts of this state and some in other states.  My very best day is when I get to see or talk to most or all of them...then you should really see me smile.